The Hampton Beach Circus

rick coco and arthur mullen at hampton beachricky looks at the sunsetrick is grillinghow good does this food look?

Rikki, Coco and I went up the Hampton beach over the August 14 weekend. I almost couldn't go because I was wanted to work a double shift Saturday night. Exasperated, with a nonrefundable hotel room sitting on my credit card, shifts at my other job covered, I called up Coco and said, "These fucking managers!" and my managers overheard me. I went to Burger King and calmed down. When I came back I asked those managers if I should change back into my uniform, they said change into a Speedo.

 

diane may have gotten too much suncolleen is helping by being the barbecue babethe smoke was thick grilling under the umbrellasricky choking on the grill smoke

We had three adjacent rooms on the second floor balcony of the Flagship Motor Court. The stairs and hallway were covered in astro-turf, there was a heated pool, and the rooms had little kitchens. Rikki had already broken into our hotel room and switched refrigerators, evidently the one in our room was colder, and had shelves. Coco and I unpacked our stuff and were introduced to the other Hamptonites, Ricks sister and her boyfriend, the living Weekend At Bernie's Roger, as well as Tracy, Diane, and Diane's son, Jonathan, who was busy downloading ringtones. The first night we went out to eat and I had steamers for the first time, and really enjoyed them. My taste buds are evolving towards those of my mom and aunt. After dinner I went back to the room and took a little nap while the rest went out and did karaoke at Stacy Jane's, where they have karaoke 7 days a week. I woke up at 1AM because Rikki broke into the room again and this time jumped on me brawling. We walked down to the ocean and went swimming at around 2AM then stopped at a porch party because I was walking around in my underwear and they were ripped right up the back, and my left cheek was exposed. And Rikki had lost his flip flops and Tracy was wicked hungry. So we stopped at a latenight porch party and they gave Rick a pair of Eddie bauer flips flops, got me a towel for my white ass, fed Tracy, and gave us beers. Then me and Matt (one of the porch people) walked back out to the edge of the beach and did a peace pipe. Then back to the Flagship to rest, started sleeping at 5AM.

 

mmmm chinese sausagecolleen and rick working in tandemeven their tongs were in sync on the grilloverhead shot of the madness

Sunday morning we all went to Stacey Jane's for breakfest buffet, because grease is good for hangovers. I took some tylenol that felt like Valium, ate eggs and bacon, and then walked down the strip to Dunkin Donuts because the coffee at Stacey Jane's was a little lacking. After much preparation (umbrellas, coolers, chairs, snacks, books, music, little tables, towel stakes, doodads, etc.) we finally got to the beach and rode waves, lazed out, whatever. That evening Rick Diane and I drove past the nuclear power plant to the Market Basket, which was really like the Basket Market, because the whole store layout was backwards and extremely confusing and disorientating. We got lots of meat, cigarettes, and corn, Diane screaming in front of all these mother-types picking out ears of corn, "This corn is horrible!" and Rick having ADD and getting anxious, charcoal, potato salad, Chinese sausage, and other types of meat. Most of these pictures are of what happened with all that food when we got back to the flagship. We had to grill it up, because Jonathan was starving, but it was thunderstorms, so we had to grill it up in the rain under beach umbrellas. Jonathan stayed in the pool even with the lightning. "You think I'm scared?" he asked me. I ate the steak tips that fell off the grill into the charcoal and thats how I helped.

 

the people in the other rooms at the flagship were laffing at usrick sleeping inrick and diane are spooningthis is Stacey Jane's during the daytime, breakfast bfufet. they ahve a life sized man up in the corner, freaky

Sunday night we went back to Stacey Jane's, for karaoke night (hosted by this huge tool who sang "Zoot Suit Riot" like a lounge lizard tool yet denied me "River of Dreams") I performed "Reelin in the Years" changing one line to "The trip we made to Hampton Beach is etched upon my mind..." a man in a wheelchair and a cute blond sang "Paradise by the Dashboard Light" and then I did Bill Wither's "Ain't No Sunshine." The porch people were there at the bar so we got to say hello and thank you to them. Stacey Jane's is the spot. They have a chalk drawing on the wall that the woman at the bar told me the cook drew and its freakin the biggest chalking I've ever seen. I do chalkings on the chalkboards for the specials at East Coast Grill, but this was not the work of an amateur.